One of my favorite, most used apps on my phone is the
Laudete App. It has everything I need as a Catholic Christian to satisfy the ADD-like quality of my daily prayer process. One of the reflections is called Benedictus Moments. If you have seen the film
Two Popes, then you will remember Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI has had a long-standing, strong voice that has clearly been converted into a gentler heart with the merging of these two fascinating papacies. Benedict’s writings show this tender and honest passion for Christ and for his brother priests. For me, listening as a woman who works for and with some of these brother priests, I feel honored to have a glimpse into the heart of a man that wants to instill the mercy and the love of God the Father, Jesus the Son, and the Holy Spirit upon the hierarchy of the institutional Church.
FULL DISCLAIMER: Growing up, I was surrounded by women. My dad and my baby brother (after 3 girls) are the greatest guys on earth. They were totally outnumbered and they lived their lives at the mercy of three teen-aged females and a working mother of four wacky kids. Over the years, the tables have been reversed. When I went to work for the Catholic Church over 14 years ago, I did so with an understanding that I will be working for a patriarchal structure. All of my pastors, with their faults and me with mine, allowed me the humble opportunity to witness the structure of competition and differing opinions was as much an internal struggle as it is in the external, secular work world. I have observed that a majority of males I have encountered seem to experience a different kind of competitive structure that is uniquely their own even if females are in the room. Much the way women compete with each other for a variety of reasons, men also compete and experience an incredible range of emotions that require the mercy and love of God. And so I humbly offer my reflection on Benedict’s reflection on the difference between Judas and Peter and I strongly encourage ALL of you (men and women!) to include
Benedictus Moments in your daily reflection. Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI, pray for us!
Judas and Peter. Both of them lived in Jesus’ inner circle. In Mark’s gospel, the disciples are portrayed as the ones that never get it. Jesus has to take them aside constantly to explain what he means. They mess up over and over. It is so real and so human. The disciples argue who is best and closest to Jesus and in times of Jesus’ greatest need, they disappear in fear and betrayal. In Mark’s version, Judas betrays Jesus after the woman at Bethany anoints his head in oil. People were furious that Jesus would allow such a public scene and that is what tips Judas over the edge. His giant NO to Jesus is clear. Benedict points out in his reflection that Judas was overcome with greed, lust, vanity, and a worldly pride that would not allow Jesus’ message of mercy and love to override his ego in that moment.
Here are the words of Jesus about the woman from Mark 14: 6-9 “Let her alone. Why do you make trouble for her? She has done a good thing for me. The poor you will always have with you, and whenever you wish you can do good to them, but you will not always have me. She has done what she could. She has anticipated anointing my body for burial. Amen, I say to you, wherever the gospel is proclaimed to the whole world, what she has done will be told in memory of her.” After betraying Jesus, Judas came back and had supper with the rest of the disciples! The audacity. Finally in the garden, when the soldiers arrive, Judas’ final touch is to walk in and kiss Jesus on the cheek. A gesture of true friendship and trust is used to mark Jesus for arrest.
Peter, on the other hand, is what an ultimate YES sounds like from the disciples. Peter’s piety, his many outbursts calmed by Jesus’ love, his ego transformed into leadership, and his willingness to change his aggressive behavior into gifts and tools crafted for God’s kingdom on earth makes Peter worthy of the keys. To this man great responsibility is given and to this man much is expected and so in our Church, through apostolic succession, it is for our popes and bishops and pastors. We don’t hear much in Mark’s gospel about Jesus and Peter after the Resurrection however we know that in the Acts of the Apostles, Peter went on to be a leader that battled the super-inflated ego (that is my humble opinion) of Paul and learned to work together with new leaders and new ideas as Christianity began to spread throughout the world. The mark of a great leader is allowing others to shine and take the “company” in a new direction. Peter leads by example, embodies authenticity, is working on his emotional intelligence, and is perhaps one of the greatest corporate project managers of all time. Paul provided a lot of content for Peter’s great goal and vision and Peter was fine not taking the credit for it.
I have been blessed with the opportunity to work closely with a variety of people with a variety of careers. I have also been blessed with an education that was once only allowed to be taught to clergy. These kinds of issues that the disciples faced and the personalities of all of their egos are not new in any way. All of the major challenges and arguments seem to be ones that stem into every workplace and every church and every time someone is chosen for leadership. No one wants to hire a Judas but we all encounter Judas’ in our life. Sometimes we might be a Judas in the workplace to Jesus’ message of mercy and love. Everyone wants a Peter to work for but could they really put up with a boss that was hot-tempered and quick to action? Do you think Peter really changed and became a quiet and meek leader? I don’t think so. He still was human and he still had to work on his temper just as much as I do when I go to work. And so united with ALL my brother friends, clergy and lay, and all my sister friends, pray these words from Sirach on leading others to Christ and trusting in God:
Sirach 2:1-11
My child, when you come to serve the Lord, prepare yourself for trials. Be sincere of heart and steadfast, and do not be impetuous in time of adversity. Cling to him, do not leave him, that you may prosper in your last days. Accept whatever happens to you; in periods of humiliation be patient. For in fire gold is tested, and the chosen, in the crucible of humiliation. Trust in God, and he will help you, make your ways straight and hope in him. You that fear the Lord, wait for his mercy, do not stray lest you fall. You that fear the Lord, trust in him, and your reward will not be lost. You that fear the Lord, hope for good things, for lasting joy and mercy. Consider the generations long past and see: has anyone trusted in the Lord and been disappointed? Has anyone persevered in his fear and been forsaken? Has anyone called upon him and been ignored? For the Lord is compassionate and merciful; forgives sins and saves in time of trouble.