My Jesus,
I believe that You are present in the Most Holy Sacrament.
I love You above all things,
and I desire to receive You into my soul.
Since I cannot at this moment receive You sacramentally,
come at least spiritually into my heart.
I embrace You as if You were already there
and unite myself wholly to You.
Never permit me to be separated from You.
Amen.
I have read these words before. It is a prayer that I have read during Adoration. What is this Adoration practice? To be honest, I had NO IDEA what Adoration was, and I have been an active Catholic for my entire life. As a matter of fact, during my early years as a youth minister, the pastors of the parish I worked at asked me to avoid the re-emerging practice of Eucharistic worship with the youth, because it was taking us backward. I avoided the practice. Mass was all we needed. Fate-filled words.
Life Teen is a Catholic, youth-culture movement that is primarily Eucharist-focused. Throughout the Diocese of Richmond, Life Teen has become the Youth Ministry standard; the charismatic experience of exposing a consecrated host in a large, ornamental case called a monstrance (not at all as scary as it sounds) and adoring the blessed sacrament came back into favor. I was exposed (puns intended all around!) to the practice of Adoration during retreats and conferences I attended as an adult with my youth group. Every time they held Adoration, I was encouraged by the priest to ask Jesus for anything. They would tell me this was a way to worship and prepare for Mass, a way to adore Jesus, a way to be in the presence of holiness. The giant, golden monstrance that held the consecrated host was described as our beautiful Mother, Mary, in all her glory, holding Jesus in her womb. Pretty awesome!? I thought,
Let me give this a try! S
it here for an hour and let the kids be on their knees praying. I might take a nap in the wooden pew of God’s love! Little did I know God’s plans.
I remember the youth I brought to the leadership conference kneeling on the floor. I looked up at the young priest I had known since his seminary days, and he was raising his hands and singing with the lone guitarist who was playing
Lord, I Need You by Matt Maher. I remember looking up at the vaulted ceilings in the University of Richmond chapel and focusing my eyes onto the altar set with Jesus and saying:
Here I am. I need you. Tell me what to do. Now, let me be clear. I have heard God’s voice in my mind and heart since I was a young child, but never had I ever heard something told to me so concretely by Jesus. If I had been unclear about my ministry and my career doubts, it all became vibrantly clear what I needed to do to make it better. I guess you could say that Jesus and I moved to the next level of our relationship in that singular moment. We found a better way to communicate, because, even though I knew Jesus was not stuck in the monstrance and is truly everywhere, I found a way to get better reception, a better signal, more bars when focused on the real presence of Christ in Adoration. The days that followed changed my life. And now, with this historical moment of no public Masses, I will have to utilize this practice of Adoration until I am able to receive again. Even though no one knows when Masses will resume, I can rest in the words:
Never permit me to be separated from You.
I can never be separated from Jesus. Nothing separates me from the love of God. Adoration
has helped me build my Catholic identity and understand the power of the Real Presence within the Eucharist. I am starting to realize that when I am not able to receive what I once took for granted, I begin to long for it and adore it in ways that create unity even in the midst of separation (this sounds a lot like the purpose of Lenten sacrifices!). I am grateful for this spiritual communion and enter into the mystery of it all willingly and with great faith in this new age.
“What will separate us from the love of Christ? Will anguish, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or the sword? No, in all these things we conquer overwhelmingly through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor present things, nor future things, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:35, 37-39)